Wednesday, August 25, 2010


 I love my husband.  He is such a fun, great guy and we have the joy of living with and loving each other.  I am so honored to be his wife and have his trust, his confidence, and his love.  I can't believe that he let's me have so much room to figure life out without any judgement or restraint.  He truly loves me and I love and adore him.

The other important relationship in my life is the one I have with Jesus. I have been following the sound of His voice since I was a little girl.  He is the one who has carefully guided me and protected me through every situation and every blunder that I have ever made.  He covers it all. Every emotional outburst, every stupid retort, every sin.  Someday I will stand before Him and I will be the flawless, beautiful woman that He created me to be.  For now I have to live with the person that I am and continually yield my will to His. But someday....hallelujah!

As I struggled recently through the long winter of my heart I knew I could not give up or give in.  In some ways I settled in, like the mouse Charlotte Bronte talks about in one of my favorite books, Villette.  But a part of me has always wanted to be awake to see, to understand what goes on outside in the swirling blizzards of the dead of winter.  The fear of my heart freezing to death  while I rest does not sit well with me!  But rest is what we need, and what we are all called to.  "Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest".  So now I know, winter comes whether we want it to or whether we expect it or not, but so does spring!      

His will be done, as done it surely will be, whether we humble ourselves to resignation or not.  The impulse of creation forwards it; the strength of powers, seen and unseen, has its fulfillment in charge.  Proof of a life to come must be given.  In fire and in blood, if needful, must that proof be written.  In fire and in blood do we trace the record throughout nature.  In fire and in blood does it cross our own experience.  Sufferer, faint not through terror of this burning evidence.  Tired wayfarer, gird up thy loins; look upward, march onward.  Pilgrims and brother mourners, join in friendly company.  Dark through the wilderness of this world stretches the way for most of us: equal and steady be our tread; be our cross our banner.  For staff we have His promise, whose "word is tried, whose way perfect": for our present hope His providence, "who gives the shield of salvation, whose gentleness makes great"; for final home His bosom, who "dwells in the height of Heaven"; for crowning prize a glory exceeding and eternal.  Let us so run that we may obtain: let us endure hardness as good soldiers; let us finish our course, and keep the faith, reliant in the issue to come off more than conquerors: "Art thou not from everlasting mine Holy One?  WE SHALL NOT DIE!"  -Charlotte Bronte

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